If you were a wink, I'd be a nod

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them all and there you have The Facts of Life.
I always felt like I could relate most to Natalie, the chubby, shiny one. She was always happy. At least she was in my mind's eye. These days I feel more like Joe. The greasy, surly, boyish one. I've been wearing Carhartts, a sweatshirt and my muck boots since returning from Ontario. I feel masculine. And not in a good way. Tonight I'm going out with my girls and I might be so bold as to put on some mascara. Probably not, though, but I might wear a bra and that always makes me feel like a lady. I also feel a little like Tootie today. Not because of her unforgettable characteristics but because of her name. I've been Tootie-ing for over a week now. My stomach is still wonky after single-handedly stimulating the Canadian fastfood industry whilst I was in Kingston with my sister. I feel dirty. At least (and I mean at the very least) I ate at Canadian chains: Harvey's, Swiss Chalet, Tim Hortons, etc.
My sissy and I went to Baskin Robbins twice in one day. Don't judge me.
I'm eating ice cream as I write this. Please, please don't judge me.
I'm contemplating having another bowl after this one. OK, you can judge me on that one.
I had pizza for breakfast. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME??
Christ.
I'm not worried. In less than a week, I'll be working my ass off (literally) in Skagway while living on meager rations in a waterless, powerless cabin.
I always shed weight in the summer and especially while doing physical labour for someone else. In Finland, I dropped 30 pounds in four months.
You'd think I'd lose weight in winter what with all the physical activity, winter camping, chopping, surviving I do.
But the thing about working hard out in the cold is that when you finally do come inside, face red and burning from the temperature change, all you want heavy, comfort foods. And for me, I feel like I can eat anything after working hard in the cold. I can't and that explains my oversized ass and thighs at the moment.
Hazel's been in the house for two days. She was spayed Tuesday and is recovering nicely. She's been so good, I decided to just leave her in the house. For those keeping track, it turns out she wasn't pregnant after all. Good thing. I don't feel so bad now.
Anyway, I'm stressing over the move, so I should go and pack some more. And by pack, I mean eat more ice cream. Kidding. (wink)
Peace.