Saturday, November 01, 2008

Foxes mate for life because they're in love-ove-o-ove...

I made Thai food tonight. It smelled really good, but it tasted, well, it did not taste good. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good. I'm dreading tomorrow's morning outhouse ritual. Too much info? Yeah. Thought so.
I took the dogs out yesterday and bumped up their miles to 15. I think I'll do one more 15-mile run and then bump them up again as they weren't tired at all. The run was spotless except for one minor glitch. I've been on this water kick lately and, as usual, drank my weight in coffee in the morning so halfway through the training run, I had to pee so bad I could taste it. Lars was with me so I geared the four-wheeler down to first, turned the machine off and told (no,, I told him) to hold both brakes while I scooted right behind the machine to take a pee. I was trying to hurry but I had to take off my parka, wool coat, fleece coat, then unbuckle my bibs and pull down my long johns and gitch before the sweet release of urine could begin. Mid-pee, the team (18 dogs) took off with Lars looking stunned.
Lars: 'Uh, Jillian?'
Me: 'Son of a motherf***ing, c***s***ing, s***e***ing biatch!'
Lars: speechless
Me: 'Lars! Use the foot brake! Turn the wheels! Steer into the willows! STOP!!!'
Lars: 'I can't!'
Me: 'Stop!!!'
Lars managed to get them stopped as I hurried to cover my bare (and might I add large and glaring white) ass, grab my layers of winter clothes and hobbled and wheezed my way down the trail back to the team.
I was almost there, pants at my knees, when they took off again.
Me: 'F***!!!'
Lars: 'Whoa! Whhhoooooaaaaa! Capiche!!!'
Again, Lars got them stopped and I caught up, with my pants up now. I stood in front of the machine, hurriedly putting on my coats. They bolted again. I grabbed the handlebars from the side and dragged along for a minute until they stopped again.
I hopped on, half-dressed, and we were off.
I feel like this year I've been much calmer with the dogs. After a summer of hooking up two teams a day I learned not to get excited. But come on, I was standing there bare ass a blazin' with my life running away and a neophyte dog guy trying to stop the missile. The occasion was ripe for a freakout.


Anonymous said...

Sounds like quite an adventure!! Be careful, those degs are powerful!

Anonymous said...

You have the most amusing blog in Alaska. Please keep up the cursing, bleeps or none!

Alaskan Dave Down Under said...

Mushers can out-curse ANYONE!! Good on ya!

I know exactly what you are talking about with the next morning after. Thai chillis and the like don't usually "get" me like that, but the pickled jalapenos do for some reason. Just find out which kind of chillis your system can handle and use them.

Yeah, yeah, too much information...