Friday, February 02, 2007

The Ruffles Report

Good afternoon. As we reported yesterday Ruffles was savagely attacked by the always adorable, but slightly bitchy, Parker. After 90 minutes on the operating table and many, many stitches, 13-year-old Ruffles, or Scuffy as she's known by her family, is recovering well. As of press time, Ruffles was hopped up on pain pills that left her a little shaky but feeling blissfully pain free. Though she has yet to eat a solid meal, she has gotten into the garbage once. What she was after is still under investigation.

Pool old bird. Ruffles, who is going deaf and blind and is very stiff because, well, she's in the winter of her life, is being a real trooper. I had to put a booty over her paw to stop her from scratching at her wound. Her face is swollen and all stitched up...she looks like Ruf-enstein. RUN! AHHHHH! So Ruffles is our latest house dog. The only problem is, she won't let Bull on the couch. Sigh. The saga continues.

Hi Gran! Hazel is always naughty but that's why I love her. That, and she's so darn cute. Ok. We're going for a run.


Anonymous said...

Looks like a good excuse to do a little target shooting with your new pistol, get used to it and all. Sam'll show you. They're making new dogs every day and a badly aggessive one is easy to replace.

Anonymous said...

If one's a good aim, it's very quick, painless and humane. A little messy perhaps.
And it was a GODDAMN joke!

AKbushbaby said...

Mum, D&N. D&N, Mum. Talking about shooting dogs...priceless.

I'm not going to off Parker though the thought did cross my mind. Sneaky Pete would be lost without her.
Here's a joke we all can enjoy. One of Ken's major Iditarod sporsors is 'Glen's Gun Shop' So, last year at the start, I told Ken he should have a motto beside the banner like 'Glen's Gun Shop: Because sometimes the dog's just too slow.' HA HA! Yes. It was just a joke. A funny one.

Anonymous said...

And, of course, sometimes the dog is just too slow!

Reminds me of an old girlfriend, circa 8th grade, who dumped me and I was crushed. My father, knowing of my misery, drove me to school the next morning and said, "Get over it. God makes more of 'em every day, now go get another one!"

I'll shoot the bad dog for you. Sneaky Pete can go get another one!

D, of D&N, the N of whom couldn't countence killing a dog. Christ I get yelled at for paint balling the squirrels in our bird feeders. BIRD FEEDERS! And all I'm accomplishing is spattin' them with a little white water color. Little girly man, that N !

Just wait 'til I bring home some moose meat next year.

Anonymous said...

If your dog sled dawgs all had just one eye, and it was all on, say, the left side, would they pull in big circles?

AKbushbaby said...

Yes. Yes they would.